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Here we go again

In my THREE DECADES on this planet, I’ve started and stopped so many blogs that I can’t even remember all of them. I have now decided that, as I increasingly descend into old age, it’s time to stage my comeback yet again. [Cue the first few seconds of “Without Me” by Eminem]

So what’s new with me you didn’t ask? I’m happy to answer your non-existent question! 2019 finds me, Sarah, trying again to discover what I want from this life. More specifically, this early morning hour finds me perusing the Facebooks and websites of women who are actively pursuing careers as performers. As a lapsed-actor-cum-copywriter, this brings out my most base and uncomfortable feelings of jealousy. Jealousy’s one of those things where I can’t figure out if it’s just me or if everyone around me feels the same pangs. If everyone does, then it’s certainly not at the top of their lists of things to discuss. For me, however, I have a potentially problematic openness to discussing even the most unattractive aspects of myself, so here we are.

The reason I want to return to the blogosphere is because, as a content creator in the brand world, I see people writing for themselves on a daily basis. I see people with huge Instagram followings solely based on being good at the whole photo and caption game. It makes me think about my—forgive me for saying this—”personal brand.” If I were a brand, what would be my mission statement? What would be my objective? My audience? If I can do it professionally for a brand, I should be able to figure out what I want to say for myself. In the end, I think being unclear on that is what’s prevented me from sticking with blogging for the long haul.

I like to think I’m fairly aware of who I am and what I have to offer. At the same time, I often vacillate between different versions of myself. There’s the extroverted, outspoken, former theatre kid—then there’s the mousy, shy, insecure girl who suffers from stage fright. How can these two halves of my self coexist? Which one is ultimately me?

So, I guess, this new blogging venture is an attempt to start 2019 with the objective of distilling exactly what parts of me are the most me, and which parts should be discarded like yesterday’s moth memes. I invite you to come along on this journey as I have a crisis of self inspired by my 31st birthday. Here’s to hoping it’s a HELL of a year.